Question: Bishop, why aren't there very many famous Mormon ventriloquists?
Answer: If you were going to ask me, why aren't there any famous Mormon strippers, I would have a really good answer for you. But ventriloquists? You got me there. But if I had to guess, I'd say it's because that person might feel some guilt about where he has to place his hand in order for that puppet to perform.
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I've also always felt there's something vaguely evil about being "entertained" by such a display of demonic possession and the creepy illustration of what life would be like if Satan had won the big game.
The "performers" (false priests?) call their little, bug-eyed, soulless partners "dummies," but for my money they look like zombies. That Howdy Doody kid looks just like Arlen Young, the little troublemaker in my CTR class, and that "Madame Flowers" is a nasty old lady that reminds me of Sister LaVera Hatch's senile, gentile mother-in-law.
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