Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Announcement from on High

Are you like me? Do you write in your journal three times a day but still feel like you aren't doing a good enough job of writing your personal history? Then you'll be so pleased to know that the church has just told all the bishops that we no longer have to worry about any kind of record keeping. Instead, we should spend more time with our families. That includes boating (at least one of your kids must be present), walks in the park, and a game we at our house call "Topsy Turvy Kitten".

Just kidding. We still have to keep records. Go back to feeling guilty for your inadequacies.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bishop, your blog moves me to tears. Thank you for blessing my life with your righteousness.

Anonymous said...

i don't understand why you would tell everybody who your ward gay is. Aren't we supposed to help them and try to get them on the right path again instead of making fun of them?

Anonymous said...

you don't sound so humble to me. you sound boastful

Bishop Higgins said...

I only boast about my humility. On other matters, I let my awards and accolades speak for themselves.

Anonymous said...

I our ward it is obvious who the Ward Gay is, so I suspect the good Bishop is not saying anything that everybody doesn't already know.

Moto X Mama said...

Are you really a Bishop? We live in Tooele but are currently looking for a house for sale in your ward. We've been inactive for many years but I think we would go every Sunday if Bishops were more like you. We currently attend "The Church of Moto Cross Racing" Love Your Blog.

Moto X Mama said...

If your kids don't want to go Water Skiing, "blog" me, We only have two kids and they LOVE water Skiing. I will have to warn you, I'm not old enought to wear a one piece swim suit yet.

Do you really have a Gay Ward Member? They can decorate so well, it would make all the other female members jealous if he comes over and decorates for you!

Tricia said...

Have you ever read the book called "Letters From A Nut"? You sound just like that guy.

Anonymous said...

Bishop,

As a single man and boater, I often find myself in the situation of defining appropriate swim attire for the young women I invite on my boat.

My general rule is to follow prophetic counsel. I tell the girls to wear one piece. I don't even care if it's the top or bottom.

Do you know of any more effective ways of broaching the subject with my young lady firends?

Bishop Higgins said...

I think asking them to wear a broach is a good suggestion, AND a good way to broach the subject.