Abraham and his buddy, Buddy

Let us now join the conversation, as the Old Testament prophet Abraham is talking to one of his buddies, a fellow name Buddy, 20 years after God asked Abraham to sacrifice his son, Isaac. we begin with Buddy.

Buddy:...and I had a prompting that I should take an 8th wife. It was weird because I thought 7 wives was plenty, but there was this prompting. So that's why I married Candy.

Abraham: Oh, you think that's weird? You think taking one more wife is weird?

Buddy: I just thought it seemed strange, yeah. Because I already have 7 wives. Plus, I'm getting really old. I don't need any more kids. How will I pay all their tuition?

Abraham: If you think that's weird, have I got a story for you.

Buddy: I know. You once found a sandwich in your beard. You've told me this before.

Abraham: That was nothing. Get this. Once, about 20 years ago, God asked me to sacrifice my son Isaac.

Buddy: What do you mean, sacrifice him?

Abraham: Kill him.

Buddy: Waaaaaa?

Abraham: I know, weird, right. He asked me to take knife and kill my own son.

Buddy: Well, Isaac is still alive. Why didn't you do it?

Abraham: I was going to. I mean, I was planning on it. I had him tied down and everything and then just at the last minute, God stayed my hand.

Buddy: Wait a minute. You mean to tell me that God asked you to kill your son and you were going to, but in the end, it was just a joke?

Abraham: Not a joke, Buddy. A test.

Buddy: A test?

Abraham: Right. A test. If it was a joke, he would have let me go through with it and then he would have said, ha ha, you just killed your son. But this was a test. Just to see if I would go through with it.

Buddy: But God knows all our thoughts. He already would have known you'd go through with it.

Abraham: But he wanted me to know that I knew he knew I'd go through with it.

Buddy: Listen, that's messed up.

Abraham: Tell me about it.