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Charles Choosey had it easy when he was growing up. His legs didn't work very well, so he got pushed around in a chair with wheels. Everywhere he went, someone pushed him. Later, they also gave him the best parking spots in the lot. But Charles Choosey wasn't satisfied. He wanted something more from life. He asked God for a miracle. That miracle never came. Instead, he began working at the Deseret Industries. He had a very specific job. He was to cull all the books and sort out all the copies that came in titled the Celestine Prophesy, keep two or three for the shelves, and then throw all the other thousands of editions into the wood chipper.

That's when the miracle came. The more items Brother Choosey threw into the wood chipper, the stronger his legs became. Within three weeks, Brother Choosey could walk for the first time in his life.

With such an able body, the people at the Deseret Industries no longer felt the need to employ him. He was asked to leave and to take his big, strong arms with him.

Brother Choosey was angry. He had a chip on his shoulder for many years. He also had a mole on the other shoulder for even longer than that. Turns out, it was a cancerous mole, and that's probably what will eventually do him in. In the mean time, it's good for all of you to know why Brother Choosey is so cranky all the time. But we love him and his cancerous mole. We love him and his weak-legged past. Love. That's what Jesus would do. So that's what we do.

And as a hilarious joke, for Christmas, I gave him a brand new copy of the book The Celestine Prophesy.