Wednesday, January 06, 2010

New Year's Resolutions

My New Year's Resolutions for 2010

  • Keep obeying the word of wisdom like crazy
  • Increase my amount of family time by 15%
  • Increase the amount of times I use percentages by 10%
  • Visit the sick and the needy, but mostly the sick. The needy expect it way more.
  • Try to get Charlie Tibbles, the ward gay, to quit being gay. If he won't do that, at least see if he'll direct another road show for us.
  • Earn another Eagle Scout award, even though I'm technically too old.
  • Read the scriptures every day (duh).
  • Take time to smell the Roses. Brother and Sister Rose said that when they are close to dying (and they said it should be within the next couple months) I'll be able to tell because they'll give off a specific odor.
  • Invite Billy Bob Thorton over for dinner and ask him if he'll quit swearing so much in his movies.

What are some of your resolutions?


Michael Carpenter said...

I resolve to be an even bigger fan of Bishop Higgins that I was in 2009.

Anonymous said...

To be as hot as Sister Blassengame.

shel7by said...

ah ha ha ak ak ak ak. it's good to have you back online.